I thought I’d never remember
The shade of blue in her eyes,
But her face came to me smiling
In the memories I thought
I had left behind.
I won’t remember you anymore,
But the morning sky
Will leave me sad
And wondering what the hell
I have been missing
I’m always out of ideas for titles. I usually solve the problem by picking a line from the poem, but sometimes I’ll just read it again and think “okay, what will I think about myself/that time when I read this again next month/year? …Ah, I’ll probably think THIS. Okay, that’s a smart title. Or maybe not. Anyway…”
I may change it later. We will see. Off to bed now!
Two loud children throw rocks at the birds.
Cars come and go,
But I stay here looking at the world.
I hear laughter; I hear the sound
Of a tiny life falling from the sky to the ground
The innocent can be brutal sometimes
Frozen eyes can’t travel. I can’t destroy this distance,
But my heart dreams of you in a rainy country
Almost a year has passed.
Your smile was so beautiful I didn’t even care to look at
All the pretty girls in mini skirts
Too bad, we’ve grown
Apart. Too bad, but truth is that
I don’t miss you at all.
Still, your smile was so sincere
I wouldn’t mind seeing it tomorrow
Under the lights of a crowded party,
Where, full of anxiety,
I’d hold your hand and ask you
To immediately drive me back home
This is probably not a poem. Not sure what it is. Who cares?
Again, he’s threatened to kill me;
With his hands around my neck,
I disappear —
In a foreign land,
Inside the house, but lost
In a million of blurry thoughts
Where chance meets peace,
And fate meets his anger
If I still have time to choose
The way I’ll die
How many hours left
Do I have?
How many tears
Am I allowed to cry
During the last day?
I haven’t been able to think, write or do anything productive for a few days now. I can’t even read anymore. This can’t be the way I’m gonna “go”.
Yes, this is a random post about my feelings and why I can’t focus enough to write anything today that isn’t worth a slit of wrists.
So… A couple months ago I met a stray kitten. She was living on campus, surprisingly. She was the sweetest, oh my god… Always, always. Apparently, she was adopted after a kind soul offered herself to take her. But today I started to think about her and I CAN’T STOP CRYING. I’ve been crying for maybe more than 30 min. Just to make things worse, earlier this morning I briefly visited the orphanage where I met baby M a while ago. I remember posting about both.
This is definitely one of the most depressing days ever this year. I hope both are okay, happy, well fed and that both live amazing lives. But, dear god… I feel like I have failed both and that both should be with me. Maybe that’s not true, but it’s the strongest thing I feel right now.
I loved you, but hated your poetry.
Two years ago, I’d say “he’s so avant garde!
Let him speak from his heart,
You just can’t get it” — now I see
I never really liked it, but could never confess
Enough of writing about my own misery;
I need a new muse:
A Greek goddess or another blue eyed Brit,
My poetry wants someone to adore
Let’s see if I last two weeks
Without writing about empty bedrooms and
High on caffeine and nostalgia
I suppose you’re okay. That’s good.
So am I. Better than yesterday, that’s for sure.
I’m now a heavy tea drinker
Who avoids bookshops
Because I’m broke
(But that’s not news, right?).
People came over today, I chatted
And had fun
(But in the end,
Here I am,
Honestly, I’ve stopped caring
About your existence.
Is just another name now
(That brings bitterness and sadness
During long sleepless nights — and that’s all.
You don’t show up in my head
Every single day anymore)
I just found out
That you’re not dead.
I assume you’re good
And that’s nice
The poet who used Bible pages as rolling sheets.
The blue eyed girl who came from heaven
Or somewhere far away in the UK.
The man with eyes of different colors;
Always in and out of tattoo shops, wandering around
With my initials on his skin — well,
He didn’t know who he was,
But I did